So, without further ado:
The 5 Mistakes To Avoid When Going Home For Spring Break:
- Do not revisit old flames. Freshman, you’re in your second semester of college; this isn’t Thanksgiving or Christmas. You need to leave those bitties and bros in 2010 with High School. Everyone else, you should know this by now. There’s a temptation because some summer lovin’ might be around the corner, but resist. Only pain shall follow.
- Tell your parents where you’re going. You’re not in college anymore and parents happen to give a flying fruit bat about where you are when you’re back under their roof. Just because you’re a college kid on Spring Break doesn’t give you the license to be a turd.
- Do not stay home the whole time. Take a couple days to visit a friend at another school, go to the beach, or somewhere else that has a modicum of fun energy. Know what happens? People get absolutely sick of you. At Thanksgiving they’re happy to see you for the brief long weekend. At Christmas they’re over the moon to have you for 3 weeks, but it kind of grates on everyone towards the end. By Spring Break, they want to be reminded in person that you exist for all of 4 days, and then you’re a burden. Take a break at some point – for everyone’s sanity, because the summer is going to hurt like a mother.
- Do not be depressed. Guess what? Not everyone has $1000 to spend on a week in the sun. We’re not all Charlie Sheen. Get over yourself and have some fun at home. Enjoy your family, hang with some friends, and maybe get a lick of schoolwork done.
- Home is not Cancun. This may seem obvious, but do not treat your poor small hometown like a resort community. Do not “Wooooo!” at your local bar, do not fist pump while blasting mad beats in your bedroom while getting ready, and do not hit up some Late Night Mom’s Kitchen while hammered. Realize you’re in a place where people know you and care about the not-soiled-on-ness of the surroundings. Don’t embarrass yourself. You’re not Charlie Sheen.

