Second Short Story. Assignment: Dialogue
I walked into the class and recognized no one. I couldn’t have been more disappointed. “Oh,” I mumbled to myself, “damnit.” I did recognize someone and, as luck should have it, the only seat in the room lingered just to the right of her. I awkwardly approached from the back of the class in hopes that she might not see me and feel compelled to –
“Hey, Chris! Oh, perfect there’s a seat next to me. How’s your semester going? How was your break? Good, huh? That’s awesome. Mine was ok. I had to go back home and work in my dad’s shop which was awful as always, but my high school friends are rad and we got schwasty like every night. Ha, you know what I mean,” she motioned in my direction and I feebly strained agreement. She continued, “So, what do you think of this class? I hear the professor is awfully boring, but is a really easy grader. Plus there are a ton of cool people, so at least that will make it funner.”
“More fun,” I murmured. This was going to be an exercise in purgatory if I didn’t get another seat next class. But would she notice if I sat somewhere different next class? I literally do not know another single soul in this room. She has no self-awareness, but she’d surely be aware of such flagrant dodging.
“What?” she chimed with the intonation that there was zero, and I mean zero, notion within her vapid consciousness of what I meant. Her eyebrows twisted and her gaze begged for more information.
“It’s more fun, Briana. ‘Funner’ is not a word or correct,” I explained, with only minor success in remedying the shortening of her face.
Her gawking devolved to its former state and she persisted, “I guess that’s why you’re an English major,” God, she was insufferable, “I was never good with grammar, but give me something architectural and I’ll understand the hell out of it!”
“Mhm.”
“This is gonna be fun, we’re never in class together anymore. I haven’t see you since freshman year – it’s weird how the time goes by.”
“Yeah, time’s is odd that way.” Because our lack of communal time has been totally accidental. She seems harmless, but I cannot imagine a worse semester than sitting next to Briana every Tuesday and Thursday. Oh wait, she still managed to go on, piercing my disinterest and blatant condescension.
“So, Chris, are you doing anything for Spring Break?”
Are you kidding, it’s January! You’re already asking me about March. I hate this: “Um, I’m not sure.” Don’t do it. “What about yyyoouuu?” Oh, Chris you idiot. That last word just stretched forever.
“Oh, I’m so glad you asked! Me and my friends are going to Jamaica for five days. We’re going to have so much fun. Of course I have to get my passport, get my shots, plan all the activities, and I could just go on forever.”
“It’s my friends an –… Go on.” That was a close one, but now she’s just going to continu –
“Oh my goodness, it’s the most exciting thing that’s happened to me since the Pope came! I cannot stand not being on some Caribbean beach with an umbrella-ed drink in my hand…”
I dropped the class.
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